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Even the best of couples seem to fall apart sometimes. There seems to be trouble in paradise. Why does this happen? Why does `happily ever after` change to `angrily ever after`?

One of the primary causes for trouble in a marriage is that most couples seem to think happiness goes hand in hand with no differences of opinion.

They link a different point of view to marital discord. And then they think they`re incompatible. They have doubts about their marriage.

No matter what, no matter where, differences crop up in every relationship. Don`t view them negatively. Every marriage will work better if a few basic principles are followed.

• Even in a marriage you can`t be dependent on your spouse for happiness. Your ability to be happy should come from within yourself.

• Discord in marriages is very often due to egotism. Trade egotism for happiness. You`ll reap the benefits for a lifetime.

• Offence is not always the best form of defence. It`s not healthy in a marriage.

• Life is very often unfair, lopsided and temperamental. Accept it.

• Don`t keep looking for shoulders to cry on. Square your shoulders and learn to shrug away problems that can`t be solved.

• The need to control doesn`t go hand in hand with happiness. The less you try to control your spouse, the happier you can be.

• Too quick to criticise, too slow to praise. A sure-fire recipe to spoil a marriage.

• Marriage is not mathematics. Don`t keep adding the pluses and minuses to decide whether you`re happy or not.

• Be creative instead. Create your own happiness.

• Don`t be a victim of your expectations. Great expectations can often lead to a feeling of inadequacy.

Marriage is what you make of it. Choose to make it good.