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Are you caught up in a whirlpool from which you are struggling to extricate yourself? Just answer the following quiz truthfully to know where you stand and maybe you will be clear on what you have to do!
- Can you say what you like or admire about your partner?
- Is your partner happy that you have other friends?
- Is your partner proud about your accomplishments and ambitions?
- Does your partner ask for and respect your opinions?
- Does he really listen to you?
- Can he talk about his feelings?
- Does your partner have a good relationship with his family?
- Does he have good friends?
- Does he have other interests besides you?
- Does he take responsibility for his actions and not blame others for his failures?
- Does your partner respect your right to make decisions that affect your own life?
- Are you and your partner friends? Best friends?
If you answered most of these questions with a yes, you probably are not in a relationship that is likely to become abusive. If you answered no to some or most of these questions you may be in an abusive relationship, in which case, please continue with the next set of questions.
Quiz II
- When your partner gets angry does he break or throw things?
- Does your partner lose his temper easily?
- Is your partner jealous of your friends or family?
- Does your partner expect to be told where you have been when you are not with him?
- Does your partner think you are cheating on him if you talk or dance with someone else?
- Does your partner drink or take drugs almost every day or go on binges?
- Does he ridicule, make fun of, or put you down especially when you are in the company of others?
- Does your partner think there are some situations in which it is okay for a man to hit a woman ?
- Do you like yourself less than usual when you have been with your partner?
- Do you ever find yourself afraid of your partner?
If you’ve answered yes to questions in this group, please be careful and think about your safety. Discuss the issue with a counselor so that you can be prepared for any untoward happenings in your marriage.
Relationships can be complicated, loving, painful, rewarding, healthy, and unhealthy. Different people have different beliefs and values about what constitutes a "good" relationship. Healthy relationships are those in which the rights of each individual are valued and respected. They are relationships based on equality, rather than power and control. In a healthy relationship, each partner has rights which the other cannot have control over.
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