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When it`s your turn to be somebody else`s rock, here`s how to get her through the tough times.

• Make your friend a `Fresh Start Kit `. Fill a box with chocolates, tissues and a ten-hanky video - because first you have to cry - and a beautiful blank book to memorialise the next phase of her life.

• Whether it`s a divorce attorney or an infertility doctor, help her find the resources she needs to work out her problem. Better yet, make the appointments on her behalf and then go with her.

• The phone is the greatest asset of a long-distance friendship. Call her up frequently. Make it a ritual.

• You could give your friend a key to your apartment. It could be a symbol that your door is always open for her.

• If your friend needs a job, work on her resume, role-play interviews and shop with her for work clothes. It could be a lot of fun.

• Nothing feels better than doing something luxurious. So treat your friend to a day at the beautician, take your friend to a spa or the most expensive restaurant in town.

• Get some friends together and arrange weekly dinners. Make sure that one of you picks up the one who is feeling low and drops her home after dinner. Once there, surrounded by friends and good food, it is easy to feel better.

• Cook dinner for her family one night, or spend an afternoon cleaning her house with her. Taking care of the little things often makes the biggest difference.

• Never react to a friend`s crisis by saying that `the same thing` has happened to you. Everyone deserves a little time to think of nobody but herself.

• Keep checking in, even if you think you`re calling or stopping by too much.

• Books often help through bad times. So find a heart-warming book and give it to the one you care about and who is feeling down and out.

• When a friend is down, a bunch of friends can take turns having breakfast with her. Starting the day well can put you in a good mood for the rest of the day.

• Write encouraging notes or poems to your friend who is having problems.

• Exercise clears the head. So when a friend is facing a personal crisis, go together with her for a long walk or join aerobics together.

• Make a scrapbook with pictures of the two of you, memorabilia of your friendship, and notes telling her how special she was to you. It won`t solve her problems, but it will certainly make her smile.

• Start a hobby together like cooking or knitting. Goal-oriented pursuits - where you produce a great sweater - can make people feel productive and energised.

• Make her laugh. Sing into her answering machine, or do something really crazy!

• Come up with a reason for celebration - even something silly as `It`s Unseasonably Warm`. (We have plenty of opportunity there!!)

• Be a great listener. Most people don`t want their problems solved. They just want a caring ear to bend.