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Talk may be cheap    but these conversational potholes could prove costly.

The list of things your man does not want to ever hear you talk about is shorter and more obvious than you may have imagined, had you given it any serious thought. Many marriages flounder on the notion that more is better, that your spouse should know everything about you.

Get this straight: your spouse should not know everything about you, and you don`t want to know everything about him. Sure, you should know if he`s a closet case or a vampire killer, but the idea that a good mate shines a light into every dark, recessed corner of her partner`s soul is tired and possibly dangerous. Boundaries matter.

Thoughts about your husband`s driving, of course, should remain mere thoughts and nothing more. Observations about your past boyfriends are all right once, but after that, why bring them up again? If they were so freaking special, why didn`t you marry them when you had the chance? And your father    hey, he`s great guy, no argument. But comparing how he did anything    from drive a car to or change the light bulb    with how your husbands do it is madness and a guaranteed recipe for marital failure.

Otherwise, there are really just a couple of things your man doesn`t care to hear about, no matter what the little voice inside you says. (That little voice is what shrinks are for). Avoid these black holes and look forward to far fewer screaming matches:

1. Your first love

Hugh Grant might have appeared enraptured as Andie Mcdowell (in Four Weddings and a Funeral) and rattled off conquests one through 33, but your guy won`t be half as bewitched. Especially if your count varies each time you do it.

2. Starving kids

Or AIDS in Africa, or global warming everywhere. No doubt these are legitimate, scary concerns. Your husband shares them and would love to discuss them, say, during a long drive somewhere. But not when he`s watching a two-minute clip of sports highlights (two minutes-that`s all!)!

3. The money you don`t have

Spending money you haven`t seen or even earned yet might be a great pastime, but it makes for lousy dinner conversation. It doesn`t matter if you`re earmarking those piles of imaginary cash for all kinds of things    it`s all an illusion, and men dislike hypotheticals. Best to stick to the numbers inked in your checkbook and enjoy your dessert.

4. The folly of men

As keen as your observation about male behaviour is    as idiotic as you find pro sports, Stallone, or shows that star large chested women for no apparent reason    don`t share them. Your man has a firsthand education in these matters, and pointing out male foibles won`t lighten the burden of his knowledge. He doesn`t need you to tell him how ridiculous men are. Especially when all he wants to do is watch one of them hit a ball with a stick.