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1. Forcing or Punishing"I don't care if you hate karate. I paid for the class and now you're going".

Why It Won't Work?Though your child may appear to go along, her desire to try will vanish as soon as you're out of the picture.

2. Comparing"Are you reading another Richie Rich comic? When your sister was eight, she went through at least one chapter a week."

Why It Won't Work?It makes your child think he's a failure if he doesn't live up to some absolute standard of performance. It also won't do much for the relationship between your kids.

3. Reasoning or Lecturing"You won't get into the advanced maths group if you don't do better in your tests. And you won't do better if you don't start studying. So you need to forget about your video games and get motivated . . . "

Why It Won't Work?Even if you don't raise your voice, this kind of nag-lecture comes across as yelling and makes a child think, "My parents don't care about me unless I succeed." Moreover, kids eventually learn to tune you out.

4. Criticising"You always come last because you don't keep your eye on the finishing line."

Why It Won't Work?It emphasises that the child is doing something wrong, which he probably has already realised but it doesn't help him learn how to do it right.



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