Children learn by example. By the time a child is a teenager, she has had plenty of evidence to believe that being an adult means not expressing your feelings, not admitting to weakness and not asking for help. She has seen Dad up all night worrying but when she asked what was wrong, the answer was "Nothing. Everything is fine. She has seen Mom cry, and been told it was only onions or she got something in her eye.
We don`t tell our children what is going on in our lives. We don`t tell them if we`re O.K. or not. Adolescents are dealing with adult decisions in a lot of ways. But if you are honest with your kids, they`ll be honest with you. And that`s important because some lies are downright dangerous. Lying may be used as a cover-up for other serious problems. Parents should take notice of the following warning signs that signal trouble for teens:
- Changes in attitude. A normally happy child turns angry and resentful.
- Your child drops old friendships and beings to spend time with new friends you`re never met.
- School performance starts to suffer. Her grades dip or generally good relations with teachers begin to sour.
- Abrupt changes in regular activity, especially if your teen becomes withdrawn and isolated.
- Your teen adopts a radically new appearance-wardrobe, hair, overall grooming.
- Changes in health. She becomes lethargic or falls victim to recurring colds or other illnesses.
These red flags can indicate a serious situation. If your child exhibits any of them, get involved and find out what`s really going on. A good idea would be to have regular family meetings to keep lines of communication open.
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