Accept your childs feelings and describe what you feel!
When we listen to childrens feelings or share our own feelings with them, or invite them to problem - solve with us, we encourage their self-reliance. We are helping them become independent individuals. It can be hard for a parent who is in a hurry, to let a child do for himself. Its always so much faster when we do it instead. But its important we dont, so the child gets the benefit of doing it himself.
Let children make choices.
``What would work best for you? Do your homework before supper or after supper."
Show respect for a childs struggle.
Acknowledge the difficulty the child is having. This also helps a child feel understood and accepted. ``Adding fractions can be hard. Its not easy to find the common denominator."
Dont ask too many questions.
When they walk in the door dont start firing questions. ``Welcome home. Glad to see you." This simple saying will help them feel more at ease. It also gives them a chance to tell or not tell more.
Dont rush to answer questions.
``Thats an interesting question, what do you think?" This gives a child a chance to express his or her own thoughts.
Encourage the child to use sources outside of the home.
Eg., ``Dad, my goldfish looks sick. What should I do?" ``Hmm... I wonder if the pet shop owner has any suggestions."
Dont take away hope.
Instead of dashing hope, allow for striving and dreaming. ``Maybe Ill be an engineer when I grow up." ``So youre considering a career in engineering!"
Describe what you see. ``
I see you picked up your dirty clothes off the floor and put them in the hamper."
Describe what you feel
. ``Its a pleasure to see the clothes put in the hamper and the floor clean."
Sum up the childs praiseworthy behaviour with a word.
``You had difficulty working on your science project and still you completed it. Thats what I call determination."