Tweet

Patch work. Do you know to do it? You should. Patchwork should be part of all our lives.

Hang on. We`re not talking about quilts or ragged clothes. This is about relationships. Every relationships needs to be worked at, and repaired a bit when need be. Patch work.

What are the things that need to be patched up? Are they just conflicts and open animosity?

Unresolved issues need to be addressed. Between siblings, parents and spouses. Sometimes we tend to ignore and avoid certain problems. Though there seems to be apparent peace in the air, it isn`t really so.

These issues just tend to simmer below the surface and colour our judgement of these people. You should get together and thrash out the various issues. And this should be done with a view to solve problems and not worsen them. And come to a conscious compromise. You will be able to handle the relationship with a lot more composure after that.

Cracks in a relationship can really be hard on you. No matter how brave or indifferent you profess to be, it`s hard on your emotions and your self-esteem too. Your heart does hurt.

The key is to find the best way to handle such situations is to find solutions. Solutions don`t always lie in a simple answer. A lot of acceptance is necessary. We need to accept situations and people for what they are. Accept them for what they are and let the hurt within you go. Only then can you hope to look ahead in relationships.

A lot of problems solving skills have to do with your ability to accept and forgive. You could choose not to forget past injustice and wallow in the past. Or you could let go and embrace the future. Irrespective of what you might think, your life will be a better one if you learn to shed your emotional burdens and move on. The more you hold on to, the more vulnerable you make yourself.

Always realise that people could react adversely or defensively because of their fears, anxiety and insecurity. It need not be to irk you in anyway.

When you`re listening to what your heart says, make it a point to listen to other hearts too. It may help you deal with things in a positive way.

Every patch up should be worked at from both sides. It takes two hands to clap. Make it clear that you want to resolve the issue and clear the air, and not whip up unpleasantness again. That should encourage the other person to come forward too. Don`t use unnecessary pressure and smother people.

Remember, there is no guarantee in any relationship in life. It is up to each of us to do what we can to make the best of what we have in life.