When we talk of anger, we are not talking about that emotion that provokes people to beat, stab or shoot others. Instead, we are talking about the everyday kind of anger, annoyance, irritation and hostility that runs through the heart and mind of the average man. Although anger is an instinctive and normal emotion, anger that occurs frequently and is triggered of by very minor hassles or perceived slights and is chronically mismanaged, can lead to high blood pressure, depression and even marital discord between a couple.
Dealing effectively with one`s anger and conflict is a key to a healthy relationship and your physical and mental health. Tragically, many of us, over a lifetime, wreck dozens, perhaps hundreds of relationships in the heat of runaway anger.
So, how do you control your anger? "But what can I do about it?", many of us ask when anger keeps throwing us of balance and threatens our relationships.
One of the things you can do is to change the way you think about the events that lead you to get angry. Whenever you find yourself feeling a surge of anger or hostility, shift your attention. Ask yourself: Is this really a deliberate affront? Try to see it from the other person`s point of view.
Physically, let go of your anger. Consciously relax tense muscles. Slow your breathing. Count to ten. It always works.
Whenever possible, use humour. Defuse your anger by thinking of something funny. Concentrate on imaginary cartoons or funny jokes. This will allow you the chance to `cool` off.
Don`t use harsh words. Words said in anger can prove to be harmful. If you feel you can`t control your anger, leave the room. Avoid confrontation till you get your anger under control.
The best way to control your anger is to work it out. Exercise is a great anger management tool. A walk around the block will blow the anger clouds away.
Learn to manage and control your anger. Remember, without effective anger-management capabilities, your relationships can never get off the ground.