"There are only two lasting inheritances we can hope to give our children. One of these is roots, the other is wings."

Are we as parents constantly searching the latest on parenting to make sure we are doing everything exactly right? Raising kids is challenging, and there's no shortage of advice on how to do it. No wonder many mums and dads are confused! But effective parenting is really pretty simple: You need to provide for your children, of course, but you also need to guide and protect them--at times even from their own poor judgment and lack of common sense. If you can do that, you'll turn your kid's behaviour into what you've always hoped it would be and turn yourself into the kind of parent your kids deserve. It is said that perfect parents just don't exist. I believe that most parents are pretty good parents. I am a good parent!!!!!! Well, it is said that it is very difficult to meet a parent who is perfect 100 percent of the time. We all can improve our batting average, for sure.
In an organized family, parents are in charge. This concept should go without saying, but you might be surprised at how many children are actually in charge of the way families operate. In an organized family, there must be a balance between nurture and discipline. Some parents are good at nurturance, or loving care and attention to their child, but lack of discipline. Some parents may be quite good at disciplining but lack a display of nurture.

Being a good parent is the goal of everyone blessed with children. Raising a child is without a doubt is one of the most difficult jobs that a parent can be responsible for. It is also the most important task for a society to engage in. Parents affect children's emotional, social, and intellectual development in several ways. One way is by teaching their children how to behave in society through direct instruction and by rewarding them for positive social behaviors such as sharing, looking at other's view points, and being polite. Parents model appropriate attitudes and behaviour. Children learn most about how to behave in social situations by observing adults whom they admire. Parents also influence children's development by choosing their neighborhoods, schools and playmates Here are the ten laws of good parenting, according to me.

Ten Laws of Good Parenting

1. What parents do matters.

It is very important that we remind ourselves everyday that whatever we as parent do, matters. How you treat and respond to your child should come from a knowledgeable, deliberate sense of what you want to accomplish. Always ask yourself: "What effect will my decision have on my child?" Be an effective listener. This will help them open up and help you avoid lecturing, one of the most common mistakes of parent-child communication. Parents need to have a good communication. if you want your children to confide in you, listen closely and quietly to what they say. Once you've heard them out, help them sort out their feelings and come up with ways to handle problems. You need to encourage your children to talk about what's going on in their lives.

2. You cannot be too loving

When it comes to genuine expressions of warmth and affection, you cannot love your child too much. It is simply not possible to spoil a child with love. What we often think of as the product of spoiling a child is never the result of showing a child too much love. It is usually the consequence of giving a child, "things" in stead of lovethings like leniency, lowered expectations or material possessions. However show your love is unconditional. Never pamper your child unnecessarily as this can send wrong signals to your child and then your child will take you for granted.

3. Be involved in your child's life

Being an involved parent takes time and is hard work, and it often means rethinking and rearranging your priorities. It frequently means sacrificing what you want to do for what your child needs you to do. Be there mentally as well as physically. I for one, left my Government job only to look after my little boys then and believe me, it has paid rich dividends to me and to my husband as well as to my sons today. As your child grows, make him self-determining, as children need to learn to do things for themselves. You and your spouse should make a list of values, qualities, and behaviour that you want your children to have, such as honesty, politeness, kindness, and so on. Make another list of values you definitely don't want them to have. As soon as your kids are old enough to understand, explain these values to them, again and yet again. In fact, it's a good idea to hold regular family meetings to review them.

4. Adapt your parenting to fit your child

Make sure your parenting keeps pace with your child's development. You may wish you could slow down or freeze-frame your child's life, but this is the last thing he wants. You may be fighting getting older, but all he wants is to grow up. The same intellectual growth spurt that is making your 13-year-old curious and inquisitive in the classroom also is making her challenging at the dinner table. Give children a choice when they misbehave: Do you want to stop playing or leave the table? If no decision is made, make the decision for them. Don't give a choice when one doesn't exist. Don't give unlimited choices. "What do you want for breakfast?" will lead to hassles. "Do you want eggs or cereal?". Stay out of sibling arguments. You can never be the referee. Both kids will turn on you.....it certainly happens!!!!!

5. Establish and set rules

If you don't manage your child's behavior when he is young, he will have a hard time learning how to manage himself when he is older and you aren't around. Any time of the day or night, you should always be able to answer these three questions: Where is my child? Who is with my child? What is my child doing? The rules your child has learned from you are going to shape the rules he applies to himself, this is very important. Make sure that your children are raised in a household where clear limits are set and consequences are consistent and fair. Talk to your children frequently about how you expect them to behave. Then hold them to the standards you set. Not only will your life be more organized and fulfilled, but your children will also appreciate your efforts in the long run.

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