Marriage is not a bed of roses. As someone said, "Marriage is not so much as finding the right person as being the right person." That speaks volumes, doesn`t it? And how does one become this Mrs. or Mr. Right?
Take time off in the evenings when you are back from work. You need time to relax, to talk and to love. Some married couples don`t buy a TV the first few years so that there is no distraction.
- Be patient; don`t expect to `tame` your partner. Learn to accept him for what he is, just as he is doing.
- When you don`t agree with or don`t like what your partner is doing, talk about it instead of being grumpy. Ask and understand.
- When in the company of others, don`t make fun of your partner, even if it is in genuine fun. The people around sometimes don`t look on it as fun. Instead, genuinely compliment your partner (within his earshot if possible); you will find that he loves you more for it and will continue to make you happy and proud. Additionally, other people will respect him more for it.
- If things are becoming too run of the mill, stimulate your marriage by making it a special day and by celebrating the day for no reason other than the fact that you are together.
- If you are hurt and angry, say so. Don`t make the mistake of sending double messages; in other words, don`t tell your spouse that you are not angry in an angry tone, when you are ready to boil!
- Create time for yourselves; be a good listener and listen openly without resorting to criticism.
- Keep smiling and keep telling your spouse that you love him. Don`t do it in a matter of fact way; get close to him, look him in the eye and say it with feeling. We are all human beings. We need to be assured every now and then that we are special.
- Don`t ever take your partner for granted. People need to be loved and told that they are special. They are not a piece of comfortable furniture that you would like to have around!
- Do things together other than talking, shopping or visiting. Play a game together like tennis or chess. Even a card game is fine.
- Control your tongue. Be honest with your partner but don`t be verbally abusive.
Working out a marriage is not easy but when you take the pains to do it, you find that you wouldn`t want to miss it for anything else in life