Most teenagers are as confused about their anger as their parents are. They don't know the reason for their behaviour. But very often, there is more than one reason for these angry outbursts.

Parents should not only look at a variety of reasons, but also encourage their children to express their feelings in more positive ways. Some teenagers are by nature very hot blooded. They are more sensitive to situations and more easily given to anger.

The teenage years are a turbulent stage. Adolescents don't know how much control they have or don't have of their lives. Besides, peer pressure and the need to belong to a group, often leads to frustration. This is expressed as anger.

A feeling of rejection is often the main reason for anger. The underlying sadness is expressed in an explosive negative way. Anger could be easier to express than tears and fears. Teenagers are usually paranoid about being thought of as fearful cry-babies. So they resort to anger instead, thinking that would be more acceptable.

Don't label anger as negative per se. Every feeling in us is a normal part of human life. If teenagers get the impression that you feel that there is something wrong with their behaviour, it affects their self-esteem. They believe that they are inadequate personalities. They need to know that there are more satisfying ways of expressing feelings. These alternatives should make the teenager feel more positive.

Working out vigorously when angry, helps to give vent to these feelings. A long jog, punching a bag, or working out at the gym, help tremendously. This session can be followed by meditation. If done regularly, it helps calm anger.

'What kind of company does he keep?' 'Are they a violent group?' 'Does he watch a lot of violent movies?' Maybe this ought to change.

Help your teenager discover the real source of his anger. Encourage him to talk about it    without passing judgement. Or, he can choose to put his feelings down on paper. He will be able to recognise his anger before it gets out of control. It will be easier for him to manage it.

If your efforts have not effectively helped him, don't hesitate to go to a counsellor for help.

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