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Moving Forward

Submited by- ruchii.kumar on 02 Jul, 2010    Relationships

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I know plenty of people whose spouses have had affairs and their marriages have split. Sometimes legally, ending up in a divorce. Sometimes they just choose to stay apart, away from each other or continue to live separately, under one roof.
My friend Mythili is one such case. After 8 years of separation, and being single, she says she is still emotionally battered. Ive always wondered why? Is her hurt self-inflicted? Why isnt she in control of her emotional state, and responsible for her feelings?
Rational thinking can change a persons thought process and consequently her emotional state, over a period of time. I agree, that divorce is definitely devastating, but what happens after a divorce? Do people let go? Or do they choose to hang on to the negatives, feeling sorry for themselves or their state? Isnt it a persons responsibility to move on in life? Is it more important to hold on to the grudges or learn from lifes experiences? Does the divorce leave them wiser or even happier? I know its probably different when a person goes through a divorce, compared to my thinking aloud. But at the same time, I do wonder why people remain emotional cripples several years down the line? It is important to think honestly and objectively. Moreover, I feel it is important for a person to take responsibility for her feelings. Any thoughts, on the matter? Would love to hear..
- Anamika

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