Home »  Beauty »  Beauty in the Mind »  Cultivate Your Inner Beauty and Become a Winner There is nothing like self esteem to boost your confidence and make people sit up and take notice of you even though you may lack dazzling good looks. While one finds much emphasis being laid on outer beauty in all the glossies, very little is actually said about the importance of inner beauty. All of us get unduly influenced by what we see and read - most women feel terribly insecure and their self esteem takes a real beating if they find themselves ugly and overweight in comparison. Some try to lose weight thinking that it would make them look at least a fraction better. They go to any lengths, even endangering their lives, with a compulsive obsession to lose weight and become svelte and model-like.

We can only say that you should work on the image of yourself that you are trying to project. Stop getting stressed out every time you open the pages of a glossy.Not all of us can look waif-like even if we try real hard! Our genes may go against us, for heaven's sake! So why are you stressing yourself out to attain something that you may never really achieve? How many of us avoid the swimming pool even though it has been dinned into us that swimming is the most complete exercise? Aha! It is not fear of water - it is the swimsuit! We devour hundreds of pages on fashion and hallucinate about wearing those beautiful dresses, but if only we would pause to focus on ourselves and dwell on how we can face the world with a presence and with enthusiasm as our trademarks, well, we can safely say that half the battle is won.

The power of thought

Have you ever paused to think about the power of thought? Just tell yourself that you are beautiful as you are, whatever your shape, colour or size may be. This is not to say that you stop exercising or trying to lose weight. We mean that if you are certified as being 'healthy' by your GP, you have a lot to celebrate. Learn to appreciate your good points and try to enhance them and stop cribbing about your weighing machine showing the same weight every time you stand on it. You have to learn to like yourself - only then can you be rid of the feeling that you are flawed. In the words of Nelson Mandela, "We ask ourselves, who are we to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are we not to be?"

Are you a positive force?

Being able to project yourself as a positive person is so important in the development of your personality. Remember, the positive attitude should come from within you - and should not be an empty act. If you are, in truth, negative on the inside, you will find that nothing outside can ever cover this fact. Maybe you are the caring, dependable, intelligent, lovable types. All these are positive attributes. Why don't you take some time to list your positive qualities? Once you've identified them, simply nurture them. You will find yourself standing tall and always with a smile on your face

Any bad qualities?

Oh no! Please don't squirm! We are only trying to help you! Negative qualities, (and mind you, not all of us are perfect!) are those like intolerance, arrogance, being selfish, betraying trust of others, being self-centred and meanness. Hmmmm.. Any of these sound familiar? Just learn to kick them out of your system consciously and you will begin to feel better and have a better sense of self-worth.

Learn to appreciate yourself for who you are

Acknowledge your achievements and accomplishments. After all, your hard work has brought you those encomiums and it is not something that one can dismiss lightly. Learn to admire all your good physical attributes with the same energy with which you hate the bad ones. Most of our attributes, good or bad, are handed down by our ancestors - so don't crib about something over which you have no control.

Give yourself a treat

If it is going to make you feel good, just spoil yourself once in a while. Treat yourself to a lovely, relaxing massage, go for a long walk with your husband, visit a spa, go to the movies with friends, start those music lessons you've always dreamed of having - just indulge yourself! All the while, remember that you are doing it for yourself.

Learn to heal yourself

Remember that true beauty lies inside you. Learn to cultivate that inner beauty. Learn from your experiences and where you come from. Enjoy life, not fear it. Shed all the old baggage you've been carrying around for years - it is simply not worth it to allow these to haunt you.

As a finale, we give you Eleanor Roosevelt's words to cheer you up:

"No one can make you feel inferior without your permission"